More research is need into the area of our fight of flight reaction.
I was told that most of my FM may have been caused because I am a 'guardian', I am great in an emergency in fact I perform better when under pressure.
Back in pre-historic times I would have been one of the guardian or protectors of the tribe. I would be on watch, on alert for any threats or dangerous situations.
Thinking about it, I've always been a 'what if' person. I can vividly remember walking home late from school in the dark, planning what I would do if I was attacked. I would have a plan of action in case somebody jumped out on me. I would carry a key in my hand as a weapon to buy me time, I would run and knock on the first door I could find which had a light on.
I've always planned for the worst case scenario; what would I do if I crashed the car, was mugged in the street, suffered the death of a close family member, etc, etc.
The part of my brain which prepares my body to fight or flight has gone into overdrive and now I can't switch it off; which is partly why I have difficulty sleeping.
Furthermore, I want to do everything myself, because then I can be sure that it's done to my satisfaction. I'm a control freak!
I can't say no. My employers over the past few years have demanded more and more of me. Every time they have given me more to do I've done it. I have raised their expectations of me so much so that I can't sustain the same level of 'over working' - I'm burnt out.
Thats' not to say that I'm not continuing to do a great job, it's just that I've had to retract my boundry to that of a 'normal' person. I'm learning how to do a great job but still be able to draw a line.
These are some of the things I am trying to address by reading the books recommended to me by my consultant; I'm learning to meditate to relax - I am re-educating myself.
This is the part of FM which interested me most, why are people with these characteristics more likely to suffer from FM?
Interesting stuff!
Stay well.
Dee
Dee,it's so weird reading your thoughts which are a mirror image of my own. I too am a complete control freak that kicks into overdrive when the proverbial hits the fan,i too over think situations with a worst case scenario outlook,im sure i have an ocd side to my personality. ridgid and regimented and when others dont conform all hell breaks loose! its a crap diagnosis (fm)but i refuse to adopt a lie down and die attitude,its get up and live for me. i have my rubbish days too im no saint and as you say re educating yourself is the way forward,you're refreshing to read and i hope my opinions dont offend you,cheers for the insight,you make sense!
ReplyDeleteHi Anita
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments, it's so nice to receive messages like yours. It helps me realise that the odd things which affect me are felt by others too. It's somehow comforting. It also fantastic to hear you being so positive (which is easier some days than others) about the whole thing.
Keep in touch and I wish you the best of health.
Stay well
Dee
this is me all over,i used to do that walking home too.I cant say No and help all waifs and strays.My friends call it my mothering instinct,isnt that what most mothers do?they watch over their children trying to asses danger,helping their little ones in their weak areas,doing what is needed to be done and generally being taken for granted.With some people it extends to anyone who needs help.Thats me.I now get my best friends to be my No women,they will step in when i am finding it hard to say No.Im a mum to 2 children under 4 and a carer for my hubby who has parkinsons.I work as a childminder looking after other peoples children as well as my own.I seem to be a Guardian of all.Never mind,i thrive on being busy and go bananas when i am not busy.At least i have an excuse for a messy house.Im looking forward to when booth my children are at school,that will take off some of the pressure.Lol
ReplyDeleteIt's like reading my story too, I work in A&E so have to use fight flight an awful lot. Now I see why I need to work there. My bosses are always telling me off for putting up with things and offering to do that extra bit more. They've started to help me control my burning out by supporting me stopping doing overtime or working on the nursing bank!
ReplyDeleteIt is interesting!!!